You Don't Get Life Back, You Get Resurrection

You Don't Get Life Back, You Get Resurrection

Have you ever asked God to bring something back exactly the way it was, only to realize that’s just not how He works?

Candace and Annie F. Downs continue Season 18 with a deep dive into Annie's new book, Don't Let That Hold You Back, walking through what it looks like when something in our lives has been stolen, killed, or destroyed.

Staying Content in Singleness

Annie opens with a listener question about contentment in singleness, a season she lived in until she got married at forty-six. She says contentment doesn’t mean the wanting stops. Eternity is set in our hearts, as the writer of Ecclesiastes puts it, and Annie says that means we aren’t meant to be fully satisfied this side of heaven. Her encouragement is to fall in love with the life you have, rather than waiting to start living until a certain puzzle piece falls into place.

She also talks about adding the word “yet” to a sentence. Saying “I am not married yet”, or “I don’t have the job I want yet,” keeps hope alive without pretending the want is gone. Annie describes driving into Vermont, her fiftieth state, at forty-four, realizing she had gotten to see the whole country with Jesus before anyone else came into her story.

Identifying Your That

Annie explains that almost everything holding someone back falls into one of three categories from John 10, where the writer records Jesus describing a thief who comes to steal, kill, and destroy, against the abundant life Jesus offers instead. Getting specific about which of the three is happening matters, because the response to each one is different.

What's Been Stolen

When something is stolen, Annie says, it still exists, it has just gone somewhere else, and the right response is to ask God to bring it back. She shares that a real sense of abundant life in singleness was stolen from her early on by teachings that framed marriage as the only full life, and how she asked God to give that back to her. She and Candace also talk about smaller, physical things that get stolen, like a friend's laptop with an unfinished book on it, and how both friends who lost their laptops went on to rewrite their books.

What's Been Killed

When something is killed, Annie says there are two paths: mourning it, or asking God to resurrect it. She describes finishing a long-held dream of living in Scotland and recognizing its life cycle had simply completed, which called for mourning rather than resurrection. Other things, she says, come back different rather than the same. She points to Full House becoming Fuller House as an example everyone in the conversation understands well, and to Mary Magdalene not recognizing Jesus after the resurrection until he said her name. Resurrection is not the same life returned. It is something new.

What's Been Destroyed

When something is destroyed, the pieces are still there, right in front of you, and the question becomes whether and how to rebuild. Annie shares about a best friend breakup in her twenties that left her guarded until another friend, Betsy, slowly helped her rebuild trust. Candace returns to her own story of having her character attacked and destroyed unfairly a few years ago, and what it took to rebuild it with her family, her team, and her friends standing beside her.

Both women talk about how much community mattered in that kind of rebuilding, pointing to the writer of Matthew's account of Jesus describing care for the sick and the imprisoned as an act of love, and noting that showing up for someone in the rubble is its own kind of ministry.

A Question About Grief

A listener named Catherine writes in after losing her husband in the line of duty, married twenty-seven years, and asks whether a good God would allow this much pain in grief. Annie says there is no fully satisfying answer to that question, and instead points Catherine toward asking what her grief is telling her and what her next step might be. Candace adds that the friends she has lost still bring her more joy through memory than pain through absence, and both encourage Catherine to lean on community and to grieve without rushing toward gratitude before she is ready.

What's Ahead

Candace and Annie close by inviting listeners back next week. A free quiz from Annie's book is available at candace.com, along with a place to sign up for email and text updates and ask questions for future episodes. The Together community at candace.com/together offers a place for prayer requests and ongoing conversation.

Sponsors mentioned in this episode: 316 Financial (bank316.com), CrowdHealth (joincrowdhealth.com, code Candace), International Fellowship of Christians and Jews (ifcj.org/candace), Grand Canyon University (gcu.edu), Nelló (drinknello.com, code CANDACE), and Candace's Together community (candace.com/together).